"Shadow Life" and "Light"
 Companion ruminations by Lacroix and Nicholas
by Edith Spencer

Shadow Life:
  A rumination by Lacroix.

  Ah, but there he is,
  Janette's newest toy. Amazing how these Gauls change and not change. 
All talk of love, and they will rip you to pieces in the next breath. And 
the horrid
 Latin that they speak, these days....
 It hasn't been Latin for at least 700 years.
 At least.
From Walloonia. A gallant knight- who slaughtered his fair share in the name
 of the one true God. I wonder if he knows his fight is about trade, not God;
 that the Muslims are more literate and civilised (they speak and read Greek),
 how his masters in Brabant sold his youth for silk.
 Hmm...
The son of a... Baron? No, too gentlemanly, but not so exaggerated- that would
 give him away as a merchant's son. Perhaps the last son of a lord and a poor
 gentlewoman- all noble blood and no land. Good for soldiering, the priesthood,
 fathering numerous bastards or all three.
He would father handsome children- clear pale skin, fine golden hair, all of his
 own teeth and a good height.
He would make a good priest. Or a good looking priest, at least. Such a sweet
 countenance surely spoke to God.
 But, he has probably had his way with some of the women, and the family lacked
 resources to procure a church post worthy of his noble blood...
As sweet as a ripe peach in July. Smell it- Janette bit him in the course of
 the kiss, bit down hard and he doesn't seem to mind.
  A soft moan.
So he is like that, is he?
 Bread and wine. The blood, like wine when I poured it bread in the morning...
 In that life.
Bread and wine. His skin was like the inside of finely baked bread and look how
 the blood trickles. Good Janette, don't waste a drop.
 She does not take him.
 Yet.
 Here I am, in the shadow of this pillar, awaiting her.
 And she wants this one... for herself. I can feel it.
 And I want him.... for her, of course. It can be boring travel with just....
 He glows now, and after I make him one of us...
 Half of me, my dear knight....
 The shadow life of which I am King.
            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Light
  A rumination by the Gallant Nicolas d'Brabant

 Janette is back tonight.
Although, perhaps, after our time before, I should be somewhat... wary.
She bit, hard, and it was so very good...
There was no scar, no bruise, no mark.
She loves me, I know it and I want to be with her... 
Forever and a night. Though she has no title to her, and seemingly no family,
Yet she she speaks of a Master.

Oh, but who is this?
Is this him?  This... statue?  No.  Not a statue, he moves
and
       breathes
                 softly
                          like a feather.
Is he an Angel?
Oh sweet abandoned God, it is the Lord of Hell.  Would the Lord of Hell have
Eyes like that?  So clear, like the icicles off the battlements.
And skin of marble.
I want to penetrate him, as Janette has penetrated me
 and have him be my master.
What, My Lord? Yes, I do want it, all of what you offer.
I see the flames....
 of the villages I pillage
Of the prisoners I bring to the headsman,
 of the beautiful temples I help destroy...
Yes, I want to be consumed,
 swallow me up
Yes, my love,
My love.
Maa......
The light, I see it
(do not go...)
The light, I can feel it
(do not go...)
La lumière, j'vais à la lumière
(never again...)
Heil, der licht, der licht!
(Non)

Fin.

August '98