You said, you said, I want to scream You said you would always be there to help me find my way But the truth is mine to see not yours When I look to find my way ... you only turn away You lied, you lied, I want to pout You said you wanted love ... loyalty Love ... I have no idea how to give to you as something you comprehend The only loyalty you accept blind obedient turns me away I am lonely in a crowd I see you chatting batting lashes at one not me You shift from right heel to left rhythmically your eyes are dancing to the beat the beat of your prey again ... and again I turn away What am I to find if not allowed to search I ask you in my dreams Don't ... leave ... I ... scream to ... myself before I wake There is a soul in me I can hear its lonely screams No where ... no way can I tear free You read me wrong you backed away never ... to take me there again Too long I wait for you to take for I cannot ask Too long it's been since I've felt your tongue scraping ... tracing blood falling from my back Why ... why did I ... turn away You're as cruel as my ... soul only ... torture me I'm as weak as my ... heart only ... mislead me Cruel ... endless ... trickery Frozen with fear ... I have only loneliness to flog me I deny myself the obvious You deny me the ... sublime I will kneel before you once again as in time past forever to find solace in your presence comfort in your ... ice blue grasp love in the ... flick of your lash if you only ... if you only carry me away
Autumn '97